Connector Field Notes #6

Have you met my friend?

Do you know two people who should know each other? Maybe one person is job hunting in the same industry where another one works. Maybe two people in your extended circle share an obscure hobby or interest. Maybe two people grew up in the same part of the world. Maybe one person is moving to a new city where another one already lives.

When you make introductions across your extended network, you’re amplifying the whole network. When you bring people together for a gathering, you’re building connections beyond yourself.

These are my favorite stories- the connections sparked by an introduction, the pure chance of the two people having known the introducer in common, and the outsized downstream effects of that connection having been made.

Walk and talk

I’m a big fan of walking phone calls. It’s a great way to use technology to facilitate spending time connecting with someone who doesn’t live close by, without feeling like the interaction is heavily digitally mediated.

The best ones are when I can walk outside with the call on headphones. I feel like I’m out in the physical world, among people and nature, while also connecting with someone one on one. My brain and my senses are occupied, and I’m not looking at a screen- it’s a win win.

Yes, I talk to people in elevators

This might be a hot take but I generally like elevator small talk.

It’s a low stakes interaction with a stranger, or maybe a vaguely familiar face at your office or apartment building, that contributes to a baseline feeling of connectedness. The topic is something superficial and agreeable- commiserating about a chilly morning commute, mutual excitement that it’s almost the weekend, a polite exchange of lunch spot ideas.

There’s a very low risk of the conversation being anything but positive, and it’s context bound by the time and place of being in the elevator. There’s a shared expectation that once you arrive at your floor and step out of the elevator, the interaction will naturally conclude.

Not everyone is willing to engage, so take note of nonverbal cues, but if the person seems open to it, try it out! If it’s someone more familiar, it can even be the catalyst to schedule a planned interaction, like coffee or lunch.