Connector Field Notes #12
Neighbors living parallel lives
On a recent weekday morning, bundled up and ready to walk to work, I stood in the lobby of my apartment building and realized it was absolutely pouring. Way worse than it seemed when I had looked out the window from upstairs. My walking commute is amazing- unless it's pouring rain. (And yes, rain is definitely worse than snow.) Despite the weather, I was still going to walk.
A neighbor I had never met was standing there too. As we made small talk about the rain and I reluctantly got ready to head out, she remarked that she had already given up on walking and called a rideshare. I asked where she was heading, and we discovered that we were heading to offices within a couple blocks of each other. We ended up sharing the ride downtown.
A week later, I was heading out to a weekend morning yoga class and we crossed paths in the lobby again. This time, no rain- but we discovered we were walking the same direction to our respective fitness classes, within a couple blocks of each other yet again. We walked together and chatted the whole way there.
How many people in your neighborhood, community, or friend group are living parallel lives? How many solo walks, rides, errand runs, or commutes could also be an opportunity for connection?
Intergenerational friendships
I’ve made friends ranging from 10 years younger than me to 50 years older. We have plenty in common- a shared interest in yoga or art, living in the same neighborhood, or the overall mission of an organization or community. Some of my most enriching communities bring multiple generations together- some by happenstance, and some with intentional programming for that very purpose.
Many of us are in different stages of life, or have different perspectives and habits when it comes to technology. These stages and perspectives sometimes correlate to age- but sometimes they really don’t. People start new chapters at every age.
There are so many ways to live a life, and community has the power to bring them together.
Balancing the habitual with the new
It’s easy to become creatures of habit. And of course, showing up at the same places is how you build community and a life in which you run into people you know.
But there’s also something to be said for branching out a little bit- a new neighborhood, a new restaurant, someone new’s suggestion of where to go. Maybe you try a new place with old friends, and run into new friends of friends there.
It’s a balance of creating space for both the regular touchpoints and being in a different place at a different time to see who else you might intersect with from your extended community. Maybe those intersections will in turn become the initial touchpoints of a new friendship.